Small-time crook Frank and his long-term girlfriend Roz are on the run with a stolen Matisse painting they plan to sell. While trying to shake the police on their trail, they end up in an affluent seaside town and break into a home of a family away on vacation, posing as friends of the owners who have been asked to house-sit. Rox and Frank attempt to lay low while enjoying the good life, even as the police and Frank’s angry associates draw near.
Obviously, I love Sandra Bullock, so I’m a little surprised at myself for never having seen Two If by Sea before now. By 1996 and the film’s release, she had already skyrocketed to stardom, appearing in Speed, While You Were Sleeping, and The Net. Two if by Sea seems to be a forgotten blip on Bullock’s career radar.
That’s probably because it’s pretty forgettable.
However, I still found it to be worth a watch. Bullock is adorable as Roz, even if her New York accent is somewhat questionable. She’s been in this long-term relationship that seems to be going nowhere, and she has much bigger dreams that begin to take root while squatting in the kind of house that she’ll probably never be able to afford. Bullock does her best to add an edge to her character – and the accent – but she’s honestly too cute to pull it off.
I haven’t seen Denis Leary in much, but he came across as very… Denis Leary-y to me. Does that make sense? Thankfully, Leary and Bullock are still cute together, with a decent amount of chemistry that kept you rooting for them, even when Frank is a complete idiot. Their bickering and random shenanigans are entertaining to watch. Throw in Stephan Dillane as a sophisticated, handsome neighbor with designs on Roz, and you’ve got what is necessary to keep Two if by Sea from becoming downright awful.
Frank’s dimwitted associates are terrible caricatures of various organized crime movies, and their antics drag the film down quite a bit. I enjoyed Detective O’Malley (Yaphet Kotto) trying to track Frank and Roz, although the ending was way too clean, considering the various laws broken throughout the movie. But it’s a romantic comedy, so… okay.
Two if by Sea is not great! But hey, it’s not terrible either, and while this was one of Sandra Bullock’s lowest-earning films, I do not blame her! She’s truly the biggest reason to give it a watch.
