Star Wars isn’t exactly known for scary characters, but the galaxy far, far away has its share of beings that you’d rather not meet in a dark alley. In the spirit of Halloween, I’ve been asked to come up with my Top Ten Scariest Star Wars Characters. These are the bad boys and girls that come to mind for me, and I’m sure I’ve overlooked some of your favorites. I’d love to hear about them in the comments!
As a side note, I chose to exclude creatures from this list, as there are so many genuinely scary beasties to pick from, I’d have lost my mind narrowing ’em down. I hope you dig my selections.
These are the 10 Scariest Star Wars Characters of All Time.
10. SM33
SM-33 is named, of course, for Smee, the fawning first mate of Captain Hook. He fits the bill, as an undyingly (literally) faithful servant of the pirate, Tak Rennod. He can be, however, creepy as hell. He’s barely functional at times, having the appearance of a skeleton that’s been moldering in some dark dungeon for eons. He’s missing an eye, which is exploited by a little mouse-like creature that has taken up residence in the droid’s interior. He glitches time and again in disturbing ways. Clanking and clunking, with a voice like boiled leather, he’s not a prim protocol droid or a loveable trash can. He’s a monster.
This fact comes out in terrifying fashion with regard to his programming. One minute he can be a loveable, if crusty sidekick, the next an engine of destruction. One bit of rules-lawyering regarding pirate code and he’ll willingly rip children limb from limb with the same calm cheer he’d have if he were telling them a bedtime story.
9. Yoda
Look, I know you might think I’m insane for putting Yoda on this list, but bear with me. When we first meet him, sure, he’s a zany little Muppet with a weird voice and a funny way of talking. But once the façade comes down in his hut, and he’s arguing with Ben and Luke about training young Skywalker, it’s a bit creepy.
The guy is 900 years old. He’s seen things. He has experience and powers beyond our ken, and that subtle shift in his voice when he stops pretending lends him gravitas. His teeth are also like mini shark teeth, and that ain’t a set of chompers meant for pulping plants! In the prequels, he’s straight up terrifying. Hopping around with that lightsaber like some kind of killer frog, so fast it would be hard to keep an eye on what he’s doing, let alone react to him. He handles Force Lightning like an unruly child, and he goes toe-to-toe with Palpatine and only loses because he’s qualified for Social Security for 8 centuries.
As a kid, what really got me, and still does to this day, is when Luke is arguing for his chance to train, saying, “I’m not afraid!” In response, Yoda’s eyes go dull, giving that thousand yard stare before rasping, “You will be. You WILL BE.” Man, not only does that tell you that this little toad has seen some shit, but that he’s going to give Luke a taste of it as well.
8. Night Troopers
Stormtroopers tend to get a bad rap with fans. Despite the fact that the first time we see them they’re utterly panic-inducing in that hallway on the Tantive IV. Hell, even Obi-Wan tells us that they’re precise in their targeting. But alas, having wave after wave of them go after our heroes and not kill them, over and over again, makes them seem like less of a threat.
In Ahsoka, we get to see a menacing new twist on the old boys in white. With limited resources at his command, Thrawn uses his Nightsister allies to come up with a solution. Zombie. Stormtroopers.
I find this scary because they just keep coming. They’re everything that scares you about zombies, but they also have armor and blasters. A sickly green glow emanates from their eye lenses, and they make an electronically filtered version of the gross moans and groans we immediately associate with the undead. They still may be bad shots, but with what amounts to unlimited chances to kill you, well… even a busted clock is right twice a day.
7. Grand Admiral Thrawn
The thing about Thrawn is that he has both the visual aesthetic and ruthless cunning to be scary. I’ve written about him before, and it’s hard not to just rehash what I’ve said, but here goes.
He’s a Chiss, so he has the dark blue skin, jet hair, and glowing red eyes that immediately make you on edge. Sure, he’s prim and proper, with his spotless white uniform and every badge, strap, and hair in its place. But, even when he is merely standing quietly, he exudes menace.
In addition to his creepy vibe, Thrawn possesses an intellect that makes him really frightening. Have you ever have an argument with someone, and they toss out a fact that wasn’t even on your radar, rendering your case moot? Or watched a mystery show and the reveal comes out of left field because there wasn’t enough info for you to put it together? Taking him on is like that, except when the surprise reveal comes, it’s not an argument you lose, it’s your life.
6. Nightsisters
The Nightsisters of Dathomir are hand-made to be creepy. I mean, they’re literally witches. There are all kinds of facts in their origin story that are just horrid, but I’ll sum up. Originally from another galaxy, they managed to train the Purrgil, (giant space whales), to bring them across the gulfs of space.
Settling on the new Dathomir, they tamed the hostile planet to their design. For Nightsisters, it’s nothing to cow and domesticate rancors, for crying out loud. They use a twisted version of the Force harnessed from the blood of their world to make their dark wills manifest.
Visually, they go all in on the witch theme. Blood red robes, black and white patterns adorn their skin, and when they use their power, an eldritch green glow swirls around them. Maybe they’re a little on the nose when it comes to being scary, but it doesn’t mean it’s any less effective.
5. Joruus C’baoth
Joruus C’baoth is a clone of the Jedi Master Jorus C’baoth, and he’s basically Obi-Wan Kenobi but batshit insane. He appears to be an elderly man in Jedi robes with silver hair and a trim physique. His eyes, however, hold the gleam of madness.
A product of the Emperor’s attempts to clone Force-sensitive beings, Joruus (with two of the letter U), is proof that the process didn’t quite have all the bugs worked out. He has all the power of the Jedi Master he was cloned from, but his cheese has slid off its cracker.
I can’t imagine what it would be like dealing with this guy. One minute, he’s the wise teacher attempting to impart wisdom, the next, he’s casually murdering people and demanding you do the same. Unpredictable as the wind, you never know what’s going to flip his switch, and you don’t wanna be nearby when it happens.
Dark Side, Light Side? Doesn’t matter to him; there is only HIS side, and with the power he wields, that makes him horrifying.
4. Grand Moff Tarkin
Tarkin isn’t a space wizard, or a mutant monster, or a hellish combat droid. He’s just a man. A man who eagerly embraces the fascism of the Empire and has no qualms of any sort in his cold, black heart.
Tarkin is scary to me because he just doesn’t care. Whether he’s ordering the death of a princess, or the destruction of an entire planet, it’s all the same to him. His job is to rule, and no holds are barred.
When I think about what creeps me out about Tarkin, I think about Nazis. After all, the Empire was modeled to be essentially space Nazis. Like the worst of them, Tarkin does what he does because he’s a true believer, and he genuinely doesn’t consider another way of doing things. He doesn’t feel bad about murdering billions, because those weren’t real people anyway. That’s what gets me; the utter realism of his banal evil amongst all the fantastic set dressing. He’s scary because he rings true.
3. Darth Maul
Darth Maul looks like the Devil with a double-bladed lightsaber. If that’s not scary, I don’t know what is. When we first meet him, all we know is he’s the Emperor’s apprentice. When he shows up to take on Obi-Wan and Qui-Gon, it’s this mystery that contributes to his intimidating presence. What can he do? How powerful is he? What the hell even IS he?
Over time, we learn about his origins, his race (Zabrak), and how he came to embrace the Dark Side. None of this softens his image. Add to it that he survived being bisected by Obi-Wan and crafted a hideous spider body out of junk, all the while stark raving mad, and the scary factor goes into overdrive.
Even when he’s got more mundane cybernetic legs and has calmed down a bit, he’s no less a monster. His drive to dominate sees him attempting to conquer Mandalore, and running the Black Sun crime syndicate. Through it all he remains horrifying. Intelligent, powerful, and completely without loyalty. And that lightsaber is still badass.
2. Emperor Palpatine
Palpatine is a grab bag of creepy components that combine to form one menacing walking corpse. Sure, he’s essentially just a wizened old man, but c’mon. He’s disfigured so much he only resembles the idea of a man. Buried in those greasy wrinkles are those yellow eyes and a grill that’s seen too much charcoal, if you know what I’m saying.
Beyond the appearance of a dark wizard, he’s got the goods to back it up. Even without the Force, he would likely have taken over the galaxy. He’s so good at manipulation and capitalizing on corruption that governmental takeover is as easy as breathin’ (apologies to Rambo). Plus, the balls on this guy! Who would manipulate a galaxy full of people toward installing himself as emperor – constantly oozing the Dark Side – while under the noses of the most powerful Jedi around? Palps, that’s who. Because he’s just that powerful. Oh yeah, and then there’s the fact he can casually toss lightning bolts (and the Senate, the WHOLE Senate!) around like candy.
Add in his ability to make you do things against your character with little more than smarts and a smarmy tone of voice, and I get the shivers. I think that’s what makes him scary to me – his knack for corrupting otherwise good people to evil time and time again, seemingly for the LOLs.
1. Darth Vader
How do you top Darth Freakin’ Vader? You don’t, so stop trying. He doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear… hang on, where have I heard that? Oh that’s right; he’s the Terminator with magic, motherfucker. Not only does he have the badass cyborg killing machine thing going for him, not only does he have a laser sword and dark sorcery at his command, but he also has the most intimidating voice you’re going to hear… right before you die.
His helmet and armor make him look like a burnt death knight in a cape. And that breathing… you know he’s coming and there’s nothing you can do. He can kill you with a thought, unless he’s bored and wants to chop you to crispy bits.
Oh, you’re a Jedi? Please. He used to be the best of you all! He knows all your tricks. He had the answers to the exam before you even knew there’d be a test. I mean, if you manage to get him to need to use both hands to murder you, you’ve done well.
To me, he’s still the scariest character in Star Wars. Don’t believe me? Watch that hallway scene from Rogue One again, then we’ll talk.
Who are some of the scariest Star Wars characters (not creatures) that come to mind for you? Share them down in the comments!