What Movie (That Never Got Made) Would You Wish Into Existence?

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It happens. A movie gets announced, hype builds, then something happens and the film never gets made. Or it gets made, but with different filmmakers and actors. And sucks.

We’ve all had films we were looking forward to get scrapped. It can be disappointing, but today we’re gonna exorcize those demons by answering the question: If you could wish one movie that never got made into existence, what would it be?

I’m gonna cheat (feel free to follow suit). In the DVD commentary for Conan the Barbarian, John Milius talks about a trilogy of Conan films he’d planned that would use the sword as a metaphor. The first film was about the strength of the sword, the second would have been about how to wield the sword, and the third would have focused on the consequences of using the sword.

I want to see that trilogy of films.

Conan purists be damned, I still say that Milius’s Conan is the finest version of the character we’ve seen on screen. Conan the Barbarian’s got plenty of action and gore to hold an audience’s attention, but it also rises above its pulp origins, and is far and away the best sword and sorcery movie ever made. I can only imagine how amazing an entire trilogy of that same quality (with Ron Cobb’s set design and Basil Poledouris’s score) would have been, and instead we got Richard Fleischer’s abysmal sequel, Conan the Destroyer. I don’t know what happened, but I’m pretty sure Dino de Laurentis is to blame.

We’ll never know what Milius’s trilogy would have looked like – that ship has long since sailed – but it’s fun to imagine what might have been.

So what about you, folks? What movie that never got made would you wish into existence if you could? 

Share your pain in the comments, and we’ll see you there.

Author: Dhalbaby

I like big Bigbooté, and I cannot lie.